📵 Object of my Objections
First Draft Created: 25 May, 2024
Last Updated: 2 months ago
Immense frustrations with my phone have forced my hand, leading me to resort to writing it a poem.
Object of my objections
I hold you in no affection
For YOU are my life's greatest bane!
For my failure in communications
And breakdown in relations
Why you, yes YOU can be blamed!
Device of detestation
You care not for devastation
As my Uber attempt goes unsought
Message uncreator
Call and upload frustrater
Have shame, for the pain that you've wrought!
Oh despicable phone who hath fallen apart
How truly vexatious art thou!
For whom, whom on earth would companion abandon
Oh! How loathsome, how foul!
Why, what worse friend be there, to one's time of need
Than would mockingly greet, then farewell?
As you slowly restart, abrupt freeze then desist
You relentlessly doom me to hell
Infernal machine, leaving ME to my none devices
A well-devised torment indeed
Acutely inconvenient, solo you leave me
My soulless and silicon fiend
Oh curse you, curse you, you miserable beast
No technological feast
Art thou
Worse than mosquito
Most irking irrito
Your replacement is imminent now
And so, let it be said
That to me you are dead
Not much longer, my target of wrath
For soon as I have lucre
I'll be freed from you, you fucker
For your crimes, may you fall in a bath!
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